(Been pretty busy, haven't had a chance to actually blog.)
In case you don't know, if I don't pass 3 classes this quarter, I'm leaving Central for Creative Arts High School.
Sophomore year is drawing to a close. I've learned a lot, and accomplished so little. New friends, strengthened bonds, and new wisdom. I know myself better than I ever have now. I learned what I really stand for, what I love. And yet because of my own inability to do what's necessary, I've failed myself.
The chances of me being at Central next year are currently about 1/100. I've accepted my fate--I know that I screwed myself over. Yes, I'll be back senior year. Yes, Creative Arts is close to Central. But it still feels like I'm gonna forever be an ocean away from the place I've come to know. But I gotta push harder now, for real this time. No bullshit, no lying to myself. I gotta work hard this time, for when I'm back.
It might sounds stupid that this is messing with me so much, especially because I'll be back and I'm not even gonna be far. I also probably sound real bratty, considering this is all my fault anyway. But you know what, that's fine. I'll be back.
It sucks that I won't be there to walk to Holiday with Cha, or to listen to Mai Xiong's ranting. It sucks that I won't be able to help friends with problems, or laugh with them on bright days. It sucks that we won't be able to run in the rain, or buy ice cream from the ghetto van after school together. But you know what sucks the most? Me not being able to do a simple task in order to stay here.
I'm gonna be back senior year. So save those walks, those rants. Deal with the problems, save the laughs. Save those rainy days, save a dollar for that ice cream. Because I'm gonna be back a better man.
"The path ahead is dark. I'll light the path, and be back someday."-my promise
Friday, June 5, 2009
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Kevin, I beleive in you so when you return a better man, don't change so much. If it's for the better go and do your best. THose rantings, I will try to save, but you know it sucks so bad! God dammit. You go and do your best and graduate with us. My heart wil break if you don't graduate with us!!! So you better raise those damn grades up and push yourself more. Challenge yourself and make a better of yourself. You have so much more capabilities than what you may think you already have. So pump up those grades and work HARD! We'll all be here waiting for you to return senior year. (: Good Luck!
ReplyDelete-Mai Xiong.